Quincy Coby - Thanks Tim Burton

 

 

Throughout my time in this class I learned why directors make films. Tim Burton makes his films to make his audience feel some type of way about themselves and the setting around them. He made me think about what other people could possibly be going through, and made me realize that no matter how different someone is , they can make such a deep impact on you .

 I went through my high school years battling clinical  depression, severe anxiety  and thoughts suicide , while everyone else was happy with their luxurious lives ." Quincy Coby, that one kid who sits in class and doesnt say a word. Oh Quincy? You mean that weird chubby black kid everyone hates? That one poor kid who eats alone in the cafeteria everyday?  OH he doesnt have this , he doesn't have that, he dresses like that , he talks like an idiot, he walks so abnormally, his smiled is weird, etc." These were the remarks i would hear everyday that would shred clumps of humanity right off my innerself. This drove me to not feel anything . I was numb because I lost 90% of my will to wistand the buffeting remarks i would i hear about my ownself. So numb, so numb  I would sit outside when it rained just so i could feel something . I would put out ciggerettes on my arm , just feel some sort of rush or emotional pain from the physical damage. I would do so much to myself, just so i could feel. But no amount of burns , cuts, or rain drops  could cure my numbness and at the end of my day  i would  asking myself why do i still breathe.

 My life drove me to not take anything for granted , because throughout those 4 years of high school , I held on to my last shred of sanity. These kids had something to live for while I on the otherhand was still thinking about why i even exist. While everyone else would mock at my existance , i would join them  . While I was chastized for being different, I accepted it , because i was . None of these kids knew about what i had going on . None of them . While they had their birthdays, Christmas celebrations and Thanksgiving dinners, I stood by my mother's side as she cried and i went  about these days as they were nothing . While they had their religion, i had my philosphy .  As they smile with their friends , i fought with myself . While they accepted hugs from their parents before being dropped off at school in morning, I accepted the concept of death with open arms every morning. While they smiled for pictures being taken by their parents after band concerts, I packed my trombone and made my trek home . While they lay cozy in a bed waiting for a kiss on the forehead from their parents, I lay awake on my couch waiting for the sun to rise . While they had their happiness, parents, friends, i had my sadness, my emtionless mom, and myself.  

This class made me realize that no matter how different someone is , they matter. How someone walks, talks, dresses, or even smiles, doesnt define them . We define ourselves, as we accept what really mattters in this world. And what really matters in this world to me , is love. Thats it. We are created by love and happiness and no one is taught to hate . We learn to hate from the society in which we live. Tim Burton , is a film director that processed his differences and relayed them into movies thus broadcasting powerful messages that could poke at ones heart. Watching his films with an open mind not only poked at my heart, but opened my heart to so much.  I don't want to be like everyone else. I would hate myself, because i let society define me . I couldn't allow such a monsterous entity to tell me who i should be . I felt like an Oyster Boy, or an Edward Scissorhands, minus the sharp digits. As i will always struggle with my thoughts , i will learn to accept them and deal with because i know i matter. Thats what Tim Burton thinks at least. I know eventually i can open someones eyes to this demonic society.